What do I want at the end?

I asked myself long ago, probably that was one of those days when these dreams were yet to dazzle my shady quietness of inside, and these feet were yet to feel a faint sense of fatigue. Did I ask it to myself ever after I started this life of brief talks with no concentration in it, formal "how r u"-s which do not mean "are you fine", food with no care in it and days with no warmth in it. I see people around me, jovial, weird, frustrated, funny, frowning, friendly, tired, revitalized, gloomy or happy....but all of them are BUSY. I looked at them and I inhaled some particles of their running guise, and I forgot to breath deep. Cold that penetrates into my bones exiled my innate warmth to hibernation. Everything that is peach overdid everything in shades of life, in shades of blue and green. I definitely did not want THIS at the end.......but who knows, may be this is not the end......>>>>>