Story of a Term paper

Here are the stages of procrastination of a grad student and the lifecycle of a term paper -


1. Pick up a very interesting (and reasonably novel) topic for term paper. Promise to yourself "will get a publication-ready version by the end of term". Make a folder with the name "4xx project". Then Procrastinate beyond all limits you ever thought of reaching.


2. Forget about the assignment until your peers almost finish it (well, some of them!) and get reminded when they ask in class about the validity of the curve they obtained assuming Gaussian distribution of the tuning parameter alpha.


3. Remember and search the project description document handed by the professor on the 2nd class of the semester, realize you probably trashed it with old magazines last week, call your classmates in a frenzy only to be directed to the elite professor's HTML-faced website (and wonder if he should have bothered to change the  once-upon-a-time-got-clicked-outside-a-convocation-center photo he uploaded in his website as all his facial hair changed color and distribution by now).


3. Promise yourself "will start with it by tomorrow"


4. Go to step 3 till 4 days before the deadline 


5. Finally you sit with it and revisit folder "4xx project".


6. Spend the day staring at the screen while your fingers changed the backdrop from Calvin and Hobbes, Anime, (and PhDComics) to 10-funniest-youtube-videos.


7. Realize you just have 3 days to finish a term paper worth 50% of your grade and surf to "how to increase your concentration"


8. 3 days left - You are putting an all-nighter tonight. This is one of the most productive and fast stages with many sub-stage:
>> Survey papers, 
>> gain confidence in subject matter, 
>> quickly regret how you could have come up with these ideas had you started atleast 2-3 weeks back, 
>> get distracted to more detailed and complicated subtopics and jump back to the easier ones (while promising yourself "will get back to these after submission and work on it over the holidays after semester"), >> philosophical contemplation ("why am i here" "what am i doing") and financial calculation ("eating out tonight or having instant noodles")
>> Slap the phone on mom's face "no time mom, gotta deadline"
>> Read unnecessary news, blogs, Facebook, and realize it's 3.30AM.
>> Go to bed (all-nighter tomorrow, pukka!)


9. 2 days left - This morning, realize you forgot that you need to write a code. 
>> Start with the code which refuses to run till about 28 hours before the deadline. 
>> Email the professor asking for an extension (pleading inside, atleast about half a day? no?? ) 
>> Bite your nails.


10. 24 hours left - It's due tonight. You just have 2.5 pages of writing and a code which doesn't run, forget collecting data and presenting results. 
>> Check email, no reply from professor regarding extension. 
>> SOS emails to savy friends. 
>> Request other classmates to ask for extension. 


11. Bite your fingertips as nails are over by now. Check email, no reply from professor regarding extension.


12. 6 hours left for the deadline - you are awake for last 22 hours straight! Philosophical contemplation (no financial calculation as you have to order a pizza to lab).


13. 5.5 hours left for deadline - Check email, no reply from professor regarding extension. So far you have stretched the write up to 4.75 pages. Use decorative sentences, increase font-size, insert unnecessary figures, somehow try to make it about 10 pages. check mail and give up the hope of extension.


14. 2 hours before the deadline - panic, panic, panic, (philosophical contemplation in between),  throw tantrums at friends, panic, panic, panic again.....


15. 15 minutes before the deadline - take print out of the finally 9 page long report, realize no stapler at hand, run to library to staple it, and ....
meet your classmate in the library who is surprised to see you rushing as the deadline has been postponed by 2 more days (whoaaa!! whatttt!!!!) - the prof sent an email about 2 hours back!


16. philosophical contemplation while eating out - look at your half-baked report and realize - I don't want to work on it anymore, why did he extend the deadline?????!!!!!!!